


Tattered Papers

by SHSL_Gross



Category: Ensemble Stars! (Video Game)
Genre: 2nd year Izumi and Leo here to break hearts, Gen, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, Knights - Freeform, Mention of Arashi Narukami, Mention of Eichi Tenshouin, Mention of Ritsu Sakuma
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-26
Updated: 2019-07-26
Packaged: 2020-07-19 23:30:46
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,796
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19982353
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SHSL_Gross/pseuds/SHSL_Gross
Summary: He remembered those days so clearly. Even though they were now in the past, there was still something that always dragged up those memories over and over again.No longer were they second years. No longer did they have such freedom to enjoy the last year at school, but instead now really wanted to spend their last six months fixing up what had been and pulling their name out of the dark shadows and back into the light.





	Tattered Papers

He remembered those days so clearly. Even though they were now in the past, there was still something that always dragged up those memories over and over again.

No longer were they second years. No longer did they have such freedom to enjoy the last year at school, but instead now really wanted to spend their last six months fixing up what had been and pulling their name out of the dark shadows and back into the light.

To raise Knights from being a bunch of angry battles with swords clashing loudly against others without even looking clearly at who their enemy was, but to instead be honest and true Knights who fought for what they believed in.

He remembered those days so clearly. Fighting with Leo, casting the blame onto one another without even truly thinking about what he was saying, and the irreversible damage the words he had said and the actions that had been taken caused.

-

_He must have been blinded by anger and rage at the time, by his hurt pride and tainted energy to see the pain on his friends face. To feel the pain inside of him that wasn't caused by Leo Tsukinaga, but by everything else around them._

_All the words of desperation and need coming from his friend, the self proclaimed and well recognised genius student composer, who was putting everything out there. Unable to write happy songs because the person he cared about wasn't smiling, wasn't getting what he wanted. Unable to supply him with means in which to battle now that all they had was enemies. Izumi wanted one thing - to win. To climb the ladder higher and higher. Wings flapping more and more as he got closer and closer to the sun-_

_And then fell._

_"I-im going home! 'Cause I dunno what I'm even saying anymore! Sorry, Sena! Forget everything I said - the king's orders and absolute!"_

_Izumi Sena could remember most of their conversation that day, but that was the last thing Leo Tsukinaga said to him before he didn't come back to school._

_For days._

_Weeks._

_Months._

-

Third year and school life was the same as always. The practice room for Knights was the same as always, with Ritsu’s sleeping bag in one corner with him sleeping inside the warm confines of material, with the table and chairs against the back wall where he and Arashi would sit at different times doing their own things. The room was mostly quiet, the four members of knights all in a somewhat serene state for just the moment between their last live and planning for the next. 

Izumi wouldn’t say it, but with Leo back everything seemed to be going well. Knights was back on the rise, the leader now back at school and bare only mentioning his time away at often times that was all that remained of those times last year. People still knew of the dirty deeds performed by Knights, the name said in scorn and hatred by those who still decided to stay hung up on those times, but that was it.

The change in the quiet practice room was noticeable almost immediately. Without even saying anything Izumi could already see Kasa preparing himself to scold their incoming Leader, his manic laughter and purposefully heavy footsteps stomping down the hall outside the door. Not only a few seconds later did Leo come charging in, papers all a mess in the hand he was waving about and before Kasa could even get a word in, Leo had paid no mind to their youngest member before he was right in front of Izumi, pushing the music scores into him.

“Sena! Seeena! It’s done! Like a band of merry men we will charge onto the battlefield and fight in combat with this new song! This new weapon will bring everyone to their knees and make them bow to us before we chop their heads off! Isn't it just so amazing, Sena!”

The rebuttal he had for Leo died in his throat as his eyes landed on the hands frantically waving in his face and grabbing at his collar. Plastered. Bandaged. Wounded. The faintest of deep bite marks being exposed out of the sleeves of Leo’s hoodie…

Besides the obvious differences in Leo now that he had returned, this was another one that only reared its ugly head at the most dire of time. Izumi said nothing as he sighed, snatching the papers that had so unceremoniously been thrust upon him and glance over the music notes written down.

“I’ll have a look!” He pushed Leo back a bit, putting space between the two of them as he properly cast his eyes downward at the sheets in his hands. Messy, but that was a given with anything Leo tended to write. Corners were dogeared and the edges crumpled as if they had been screwed up. Slight tears in the thing paper here and there showed signs of lead having been pressed too hard and then vigorously rubbed away with an eraser. Somehow on top of that all was a song that when Izumi sang the notes in his head flowed together brilliantly.

Images of memories Izumi didn't enjoy came back to him suddenly, of visiting Leo in attempts to make amends, to bring him back to school during his months away. Of seeing the other boy completely broken, completely torn apart over what had happened with Eichi Tenshouin and their old members of Chess. How no matter what amazing song they sang, all they were met with was crowds of boos and faces of hatred. Izumi had lost himself to the climb of Knights, and the fall of Knights. Leo had lost himself - everything that he was torn and ripped apart like a discarded toy no longer wanting to be played with by the child who owned him.

The dark gloomy state of Leo’s bedroom, the walls were covered in the manic scribbles of a crazy man, dark heavy lines drawn onto the paint and the crossed out and redrawn over and over, just looking at it had made Izumi feel sick. Leo, completely unresponsive to outside sources, didn't even look up or seem to acknowledge that Izumi was visiting him. Izumi knew well enough of Leo’s habits of blanking people when he was suddenly inspired, but this was on an entirely different level.

Leo looked as if he hadn't slept in days, or maybe he had slept too much. Whether he even knew what day or what time it was was a mystery to Izumi, the room was just dark. Curtains drawn tightly shut, stuffy with the lack of fresh air from no open window and in the middle of everything, was Leo himself. Sat on the bare floor of his room, what could only be hundreds of scattered papers, all in various states of distress and all with half finished songs completely crossed out. 

Just looking at everything around him was bad enough, but actually looking at the boy who used to have boundless energy for the things he loved, was the worst part. Izumi could see in his hand a pen tightly clutched between fingers. So many others lay around his feet all broken or dried out from the constant misuse of ink. Orange hair, that yes was usually in some state of mess, was completely neglected. Bright green eyes that had been full of life and mischief were now just empty and tired.

Broken.

The thing that made him finally look away in a sort of shocked horror was the fact that even though Leo was surrounded by the failed drafts out countless amount of songs, obviously having lost all inspiration that the genius composer claimed to have at the drop of a hat, was that he was still forcing himself to write. Pushing himself past his limits in what seemed like a futile attempt at fixing himself. The way his teeth sunk and tore into the flesh on his hands, bite marks going deep into the layers of skin and drawing blood at the centre and around his nails, was a contrast so far to what Izumi was used to seeing.

Shaking hands, bleeding and red raw with what could have only been pain by the unshed tears in Leo’s eyes, was something he’d never forget.

“Leader! Good heavens, your hands!” At the sudden declaration from Kasa, Izumi tore his eyes from the sheets in his hands and to their Leader and newest member, the former looking as if he was about to either have a breakdown or lose his head in frustration. “What happened? If you did this on purpose, I will not be able to hold myself back, Leader! We’re Knights, we’re supposed to hold ourselves at the level of noble and proper, wounds are unsightly!”

Izumi watched as Leo held his hands up towards Kasa’s face,the younger boy taking a step back in mild disgust at the state of the plasters covering Leo’s palms and then withdrew his hands to look at them himself. “Oh, Suou~ That’s no way to speak to you king! Horrible child! I was badly hurt and you only care about how my hands look! Vile creature with no heart!”

“You should be happy that your gloves will cover it all up, Leader. What would our fans think if they saw your hands completely covered in bandages?”

“You have such a good point, Suou! Wahaha! We are knights after all so maybe hearing this will make you ever so happy that you’ll smile - I rescued a cat! That’s a heroic deed which only a knight could do but the poor little thing was so scared that it clawed and bit my hands all over! I really cannot blame it though when be rescued by a king that’s only used to the bloodshed and carries a sword on his back at all times to fight in combat!”

A cat? So he says, but Izumi knew the truth. Somewhere deep down, Leo even knew the truth. Of what he had put himself through, of what he was still going through it seemed. Whether or not Leo knew that Izumi knew was a different matter, but they both knew the truth.

It wasn’t a cat which had torn into Leo’s hands.

It wasn’t a cat that had torn at the sheets of paper which Izumi still head in his hands. It wasn't a cat which had pushed himself so much to get another song out. 

“Leo-kun,” Izumi spoke up, watching as Leo turned back to him, now once again blanking Kasa as Izumi gave a small smile and waved the papers about. “It's good. We can definitely fight well with this newest weapon you’ve brought us.”

**Author's Note:**

> Okay, wow I am so sorry for any inaccuracies that there may be. Honestly I have only been into Enstars for about a week now but Leo in the past 3 days of so completely became my second best boy and I just love him so so much. Knights as whole is a good group. I have read many of the stories for them, and the line I used in this one comes from the Halloween Event and the flashbacks to Izumi visiting Leo come from Checkmate and theres also some hints to Rebellion as well! Once again, im sorry if there is anything completely wrong but im still very new and learning everything with Enstars and theres still so much I havent read yet!


End file.
